Ian Bakker is an eccentric middle class citizen with a variety of average skills. Among friends he is regarded as a friendly, family-loving pseudointellectual who enjoys working to pay the bills while attending classes at the University of Utah in an ever present effort to become part of the 1% (and eventually achieve world domination).

In his free time he enjoys planning tactical moves to position himself closer to key parties that will be instrumental in achieving these goals. He is also an avid badminton player and typically begins a match in the style of Inigo Montoya, playing with his non dominate hand first to get a feel for his opponent’s skills, then all at once begin to slay them with his dominate hand, even after his prowess has been established. Ian and his beautiful wife, Alicia, also enjoy taking their now non-ethereal children on lavish hiking trips on nearby mountain ranges.